Is My Dress Too Short?

This is another helpful guide to girls who wonder if their dress is too short.  Frankly, we don’t understand why this question would arise in the first place.  We have a Dress Code, which ensures that girls are properly dressed, and fully decent at all times on campus.  Through the fastidious enforcement of this Dress Code, we ensure that a girl’s dress is not too short.

So, without any more beating about the bush, so to speak, here is the girl who asked us this question most recently…

Clearly, the dress is not too short.  Yet, the question was asked.  So we wonder, what prompted her to wonder if her dress is too short?  Naturally, she isn’t wearing panties, because she’s a good girl, who follows the Dress Code.  The whole idea of forcing girls to go without panties is to encourage them to wear dresses that are long enough for them to feel completely comfortable. 

Can we ask you to turn around, then?  Perhaps the dress, which is plenty long enough in front, is less than ideal in back.  So let’s see if that seems to be your problem, OK?

No, that’s not it.  This girl is completely decent, both front and back, and her dress is plenty long enough to cover up anything she may regard as private.

So what could her problem be, then?  Oh, my God, could it be…  No!  That would be unthinkable!

The thought that crossed our mind was that the girl may not be such a good girl, after all.  Maybe she is violating the dress code by wearing a thong that snuggles between her cute little cheeks, just out of view by any roving inspectors.  It’s just this sort of evil student, who seeks to violate the Dress Code, who makes life that much harder for the rest of you.  To root out girls who may be violating the code, it is necessary to preferentially target girls who are wearing dresses long enough to hide such a violation.

So the question this girl asked was all wrong.  She should have asked “Is my dress too long?” — and the answer is YES!  Girls, don’t fall into the same bad behavior as this girl.  Maybe she’s hiding a thong, and maybe she’s not, but the fact is, she’s wearing a dress long enough that she might be hiding a thong, and this makes her very suspicious!

We’re not all inspectors, of course.  But this is something we are considering changing for the next school year.  You see, there just aren’t enough inspectors to follow up on every girl who, like this pretty co-ed, is wearing a suspiciously long dress.  So, starting next school year, we are considering deputizing every student to help inspect girls — within limits, of course!

Were’ talking “Student Inspections” here…  We were thinking that each student should be allowed, just once per day, to perform a minimal inspection on any girl on campus.  What do we mean “minimal” in this context?  A student who suspects a girl of wearing panties may ask the girl to spread her legs and bend over.  Often, this is all it takes to clear the girl of wrongdoing.

While this girl appears innocent of any Dress Code infraction, and may very well be innocent, some girls have been known to engage in panty stuffing.  A proper inspection would include a vaginal examination, which is needed to be sure this is a good girl.  To facilitate manual entry, gentle manipulation of the girl’s inner thighs, buttocks, and perineum will cause her to secrete helpful lubrication.

If the student inspector is a boy, then while the girl is still bent over, with her legs spread, he should make an important determination.  As he gently strokes her tender lips to gauge their degree of slipperiness, he should warn her that he suspects her of publicly displaying sexual excitement.  Sometimes a girl will beg the boy not to rape her, which is understandable.  Whether or not to rape the girl is an important decision the boy must make at this point.  Maybe her sexual excitement was just a by-product of the manipulation necessary for the inspection.  Maybe her excitement would not be so public if she weren’t bent over.  If these mitigating circumstances exist, it’s not necessary for the boy to rape the girl, but sometimes the boy needs a concession from the girl to help him decide not to rape her.  For this reason, a girl might offer her dress to the boy, and agree to go naked, if he agrees not to rape her.  On the other hand, if the boy decides to rape the girl, he may remove her clothing first, so in either case, it is reasonable to ask the girl to remove her dress while he makes up his mind.

The most important thing for both the girl and her Student Inspector to keep in mind is that the goal of the whole exercise is to encourage girls to obey the rules, never to wear underwear, and dress as decently as possible.  The goal is not to punish or humiliate the girl, even though that side effect is inevitable.  The second most important thing for everyone to remember is that a girl should not wear a dress so long that another student might reasonably suspect she’s using her dress to hide a violation of the Dress Code.

So while it’s common for a girl to worry, “is my dress too short”, she should also worry “is my dress too long” as it turned out to be in this story.   The lesson this girl must learn is to wear dresses that are not too short that she feels uncomfortable, but not too long that she looks suspicious.

Thanks so much for reading this story to the very end!  It will help both girls and their possible future student inspectors, if we decide to make that change to the Dress Code next year.

4 thoughts on “Is My Dress Too Short?

  1. base

    Indeed, “is my dress too short” is not an appropriate question. Only the girl knows whether her dress is too short or not. No one else can tell her. It is up to her to decide the limits of her decency. Some girls are quite comfortable with a dress hem at their hip line. While this reveals more than other girls might desire, the hemline is appropriate for that girl if she feels it is decent. The next girl might think exposing her knees is indecent. That is her own call to make. She is allowed to wear longer dresses than is currently fashionable on campus. She understands the problem such a dress faces with the inspectors, but if she wishes to remain decent in her mind, she should be comfortable wearing longer hems and feel no indecency during any inspection.

  2. William Kazak

    I like the idea of a girl “remaining decent in her mind”. That is the key element here. If an inspection is required of such a girl, then anyone thinking her dress is too short or too long would be of no consequence to her. What matters is the Dress Code. She could easily remove her dress for an inspector to see if she was in violation. She could just as easily spread her legs and let the inspection continue. In any case, she would remain decent in her own mind.

  3. evaluator

    And “decent in her own mind” reflects the way that society’s attitudes change about clothing. Those attitudes have changed over time, and according to place. Most women would be comfortable wearing much less on a beach (especially a European one) than in an office setting. Today, lots of girls are wearing tights as if they were pants, while that would have pretty provocative 10 years ago. The College Code of Conduct may be coming sooner than we think…

  4. Slick P. Wraith

    Sooner than we think indeed!

    The amount of thongs (and butt cracks) I’ve seen this summer popping out the top of various girls’ ‘Hipster’ trousers/shorts etc (known I think as ‘whale tail’), was quite something. I am not making this up.
    Most of the girls I saw didn’t even know this was happening and the ones that did notice, simply pulled up their jeans but as soon as they sat down, thong and/or butt crack came out to say hello again.

    And don’t even get me started on how low some of the younger guys are wearing their trousers! Halfway down their butts with their boxers (and God knows, what else?) hanging out!


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.