Monthly Archives: April 2008

Lynn – the Taxman Cometh (archives)

Lynn entered her dorm room wearing nothing but a smile – a big beaming smile.

Arlene was as naked, but she was in the room all afternoon. When she saw Lynn smiling and naked, she had to ask, “What are you so happy about? Looks like you got the rotten end of an inspection.”

Lynn laughed as she dumped her books on her desk. She spun around and flopped on her bed. “Professor McKinley finally got what was coming to her.”

Arlene’s interest was piqued. “I think maybe she got what was coming to you, too. In case you haven’t noticed, you’re naked.”

Lynn said, “Well worth it to me.”

Arlene set down her book and flopped on the bed next to her naked room mate. “Okay, start at the beginning, and don’t leave out the good parts.”

Lynn giggled, “I never do, do I?”

Arlene replied, “Not after you force me to drag the story out of you. Should I start tickling now?”

Lynn jumped on instinct. Last time Arlene tickled her, she literally peed her pants. That meant leaving her wet pants at the Student Union and walking home bottomless. Lynn did not want to be tickled like that again. She said, “Okay, I’ll tell you, but no tickling!”

Arlene pouted, but her smile broke through.

Lynn began, “Professor McKinley was talking about the same boring supply and demand curves, and I wasn’t paying much attention. Outside of the window, some poor girl was getting inspected. That’s when she called on me to answer a question. I confessed I didn’t hear the question. She went all crazy on me telling the class I was going to fail the exam. I protested, but she didn’t like me standing up for myself. That’s when she demanded I strip for failing to answer her question. I was so upset with her, I stripped as I walked to the front of the class and tossed my clothes on her desk.”

Arlene laughed, “Maybe next time you won’t daydream about another girl’s nightmare.”

Lynn said, “Doubtful, but that’s her idea anyhow. Well, she made me stand in front of the class as she asked the question again. I knew the answer and gave her the perfect answer. She didn’t like that, so she kept drilling me. Fortunately, I had read ahead and had all the answers. She finally told me to sit down and pay more attention.”

Arlene asked, “More attention? I thought you answered all her questions.”

“I did, but she didn’t know what else to say. I didn’t even make it to my seat when these three men dressed in black suits burst into the class room. I spun around. One taught my eye and smiled. A real cutie for an older guy.”

Arlene said, “Older? How old are we talking here?”

Lynn said, “Real old, like 30 or so, but still cute.”

“What did they want you for?”

Lynn huffed, “Let me tell the story. They didn’t want me. They wanted Professor McKinley! They handed her a piece of paper and told her that for back taxes she owed, they were seizing all her property to sell.”

“She owed back taxes?”

Lynn laughed, “Apparently, her tax accountant was very creative, and according to the IRS agents, she was her own accountant under a pseudonym. She was trying to get out of paying taxes by making it look like her accountant fled the country. Once the IRS figured it all out, they got a court order to seize everything she owned. Her house, her furniture, her car, her bank accounts everything!”

Arlene said, “She might be a bitch and a tax evader, but I don’t like the IRS having that much power.”

Lynn said, “Well, generally neither do I, but this one time, I was thrilled.  The agents came to get everything from her while other agents were seizing her property at her house and from her office. These three were sent to get her personal belongings she had on her. At first, it appeared she was just going to give up her jewelry and watch, but the cute agent smiled at me when he said she also needed to turn over her entire wardrobe, including what she was wearing.”

Arlene said, “Oh no! Do you mean they stripped her bare in the class room?”

Lynn continued, “Exactly what I mean. She tried to dismiss class, but no one budged. She then tried to get the agents to step into the hallway, but they refused. She was forced to strip in front of the class – just like she made me do.”

Arlene raised her hands and shouted, “Justice lives!”

Lynn laughed. “You got that right! Professor McKinley has a really great body, too. You’d never know from the clothes she wears, but she really is in fine shape. And the entire class finally got the answer to the question, ‘Are those real?’ Yes, her boobs are the real deal.”

Arlene said, “Sounds like you started daydreaming again.”

Lynn blushed. “Now don’t go spreading that rumor! Well, the agents came and got everything from her, so they left, and she wasted no time in claiming my clothes! I protested as she wrapped the skirt around her waist, but I really complained as she stretch my little crop sweater over her boobs! I guess I yelled pretty loud about her big boobs cause the cute agent came back into the room. He asked, ‘Those your clothes, too?’ I explained before she could answer that the clothes were mine, but Professor McKinley said, ‘Mine now.’ I was upset when the agent declared, ‘I’ll need to take those clothes, too. Sorry.'”

Arlene said, “Oh my! She not only stripped Professor McKinley, but he left you naked, too?”

Lynn nodded, “Yep. End of class, too. The professor was embarrassed to leave the building, especially with her whole class following behind her. I think she was heading to her car when she realized, no keys, and the car was probably being towed. She had to turn around and walk to her office. We all followed her. The Dean of Economic Studies stopped her and questioned why she was nude. She lied about academic freedom. He shrugged and continued on his way. She turned to us and made us promise not to tell a soul. We did. Her office looked like a hurricane hit it. She sat down. I asked, ‘Are you available for office hours right now?'”

Arlene sat up, “You didn’t, did you?”

Lynn boasted, “I did. She explained the whole situation to us. She also explained that she still owed plenty to the IRS. The seizure of assets wasn’t enough to pay her debts. She had her wages garnished. She had to work, but for so little pay – just enough to eat. I probably should have been nicer right then, but I felt she got what was coming to her. I laughed that meant she couldn’t afford new clothes. She warned me that the IRS agents wouldn’t be in class everyday, and she had the authority to take my clothes if she wanted to do so. I laughed, ‘Not if I’m not wearing any to your class!'”

Arlene looked straight in Lynn’s eyes, “You’re not bluffing!”

Lynn said, “Not at all. For the rest of the semester, I might have to attend that one class naked, but so will she!”

Arlene said, “But don’t you have Calculus right before Econ?”

Lynn said, “Oops. I forgot about that. I guess I’ll be going to both classes without clothes unless you want to come get my clothes in between classes.”

Arlene said, “No thanks. If the inspectors see me carrying your clothes, I’ll be the one stripping in public!”

Lynn said, “You know, being stripped in public ain’t so bad, especially when you know you have other clothes to wear. Professor McKinley won’t have that option for years!”

Excellent, base. And there can be done plenty more with that back taxes idea!
Comment By Grinch At 4/17/2008 12:56 PM

Nice story, base. Thanks for not misspelling ‘piqued’. Once a girl emailed me to say I should ‘bare with her’. I ran down the steps two at a time, and closed her office door behind me. She was astonished at the suddenness of my entry. ‘What the fuck are you doing here?’ she asked me. ‘Exactly,’ I replied.


Comment By Richard Hertz At 4/18/2008 12:41 AM

I was failing Professor McKinley class before the taxman took her clothes. After that day I always pay attention in class, and my grade picked. Maybe the dress code should be extend to the teachers.
Comment By bill At 8/12/2010 5:24 PM